Friday, September 23, 2011

Time Away - Prayers Needed

It has been almost a week since I last blogged. This week has been a roller coaster of emotions and events. School problems, renovations that are taking forever, family issues and now illness have had me pulling back from time on the computer. I have not participated in several memes I usually so enjoy. It is a strange place to be in.

This week I also heard about the death of my former hairdresser from lung cancer at age 61 and the diagnosis of a close friend's sister of lung cancer (she is 61). I turn 60 in less than 4 months and am having a wee bit of a challenge with that.

Then tonight I listened to Steve Jobs give a commencement speech at Stanford back in 2005. What an inspiring speech. His advice was to find what you love and pursue it; to stay thirsty; to connect the dots.

Then visiting another blog, I read this poem:

John O'Donohue's To Bless the Space Between Us ( the last two stanzas of his poem "A Morning Offering.")

may my mind come alive today
to the invisible geography
that invites me to new frontiers
to break the dead shell of yesterdays
to risk being disturbed and changed

may I have the courage today
to live the life that I would love
to postpone my dream no longer
but do at last what I came here for
and waste my heart on fear no more.

Postponing dreams, not wasting time, doing what I love - great advice - coming from 2 very different sources.

I do believe in prayer - it has certainly helped this week. I am seeking yours in helping me lift this dark veil that seems to be closing in. I want to be positive, to be seeking new dreams. I don't like the space I am in right now.

I definitely needed Steve's words and the lines of the poem.

Thanks for your help.


ChrisJ said...

B's G: I've been where you are and it's scary. The last time I had an episode like this (not too long ago actually -- an allergic reaction to two medications) I found these words a great comfort to me, " the shadow of thy wings I will rejoice". I didn't feel like rejoicing, but being in the shelter of His wings helped me feel that He knew what I was feeling and what was going on in my life and He still loved me. He drew me into the shelter of His wings to comfort me. Blessings and prayers.

Anonymous said...

Sending you prayers, love, and hugs. I've circled in and out of this place you describe, being nearly 60 and experiencing what comes with this "number." If you ever need an ear, let me know. I can't fix things, but I can listen!

Emma said...

Lovely words, they certainly help with the healing process & give us the courage to look within ourselves for the strength we need. Give yourself time & arrange a treat - you're worth it ;)

Paula - Buenos Aires said...

You were beautifully guided to the words you needed. {gentlest, warmest hug} Thinking of you and sending spring flowers perfumed breeze and blue skies from home.

Anonymous said...

Oh dear Beverly! I want to reach out through the internet and give you a big hug and tell you that it's going to be alright! I believe in prayers, too, and I believe that finding yourself coming across these particular things you wrote of - the commencement speech and that wonderful poem - are divine promptings, God taking you by the hand and leading you to what He wants you to know. And, although I don't practice what I preach, I also believe that we should allow ourselves to feel our feelings, even if they're yucky, because it's our heart talking to us, maybe trying to help us re-adjust to face our own true north. So, give yourself all the extra rest and self-love that you need right now to process what you're feeling. Especially to acknowledge the grief you're feeling from finding out about the sufferings of these friends and acquaintances. And know there are lots of people who care about you, even out here in blogland! When your birthday rolls around it will be a time for celebration and good feelings. No yucky feelings allowed! ((((BIG HUGS)))

and P.S. Thank you sooooo much for your wonderful comment to me on my blog! You made me feel so good.

One more P.S. I don't know if you're familiar with flower remedies, but there is a remedy called Star of Bethlehem that is excellent (and ever so gentle) in helping one deal with an overload of trauma and grief in their lives. Just Google Bach Flower Remedies.